悪夢
[Akumu]
By Bayou
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One shot
[KyouxMaou]
Maou POV
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One shot
[KyouxMaou]
Maou POV
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The nightmare came...
It's been a while since I had that bad dream...
Being in that cold abandoned storage by the pier, raped countlessly by many men, beaten into pulp, left alone for three days; severely hurt, starving, and dehydrating. Counting every second of my dear life for the death to come.
My eyes snapped open and I stared at the familiar ceiling of my apartment. I was perspiring because of the nightmare.
I sighed in relief when I felt the warmth of my lover's body next to me. I never had any soothing skinship this close ever since my mother died. I was afraid of others touch from the time when I was gang raped and tortured half to death, literally. Kyou was the only person on earth who could touch me and made me feel comfortable.
I writhed in bed and snuggled inside Kyou's embrace. I glanced up and looked at his rough feature; I touch his stubble and snickered. He always stubbornly kept his stubble no matter how much I nagged him to shave it.
I started to think, if only my life had been a fairytale, and a knight in shining armor would come to my rescue that day, then I wouldn't have been suffered like this for years.
I snuggled on Kyou's chest. My movement woke him up; he mumbled and opened his eyes.
"What's wrong, Maou-san? Can't sleep? Was I too rough?" he asked with hoarse voice, stroking my face while sleep was still in his eyes.
He was always this gentle, that's the reason I came to love him.
I smiled and shook my head, "No, not that," I said.
He grinned and held me close. "Thank god," he sighed in relief, "I thought I might overdo you and make you uncomfortable."
I kissed his stubble chin and bit it playfully, made him chuckled.
"You know how high my libido is," I jested, "The sex before was nothing compared what we had last week."
He laughed.
Indeed, last week we had the longest and the most intense sex we ever had. We did it all night long till morning and came countless time until we had dry orgasm and stopped soon after that.
It was all because we didn't have a chance to have sex for two whole weeks because of Kyou's final exam. He begged me to leave him alone so he could concentrate studying for his exam so he wouldn't fail. It was tough since we were so close at each other, yet, we couldn't touch one and another.
So when finally Kyou got home on the last day of his exam, he jumped at me as soon as he stepped his foot into the apartment and ravaged me whole night long.
"Kyou," I called him.
"Hmm?" he answered while kissing my hair, rubbing his face into it. He was like an over friendly big dog when he did that.
"Do you think if the incident never happened, would I be a completely different person? Perhaps I'd be a happier person?"
"Which incident?" he asked.
"You know, the thing that happened to me in the past..."
He pulled back from his embrace to look at me in puzzled expression, crossing his eyebrows. "Are you unhappy now, Maou-san?"
"No, it's not like that. I'm happy, but if the incident never happened, would I be happier than this?"
Kyou sighed, he scratched his nose and saying his opinion, "Well, if things were different in your past, Maou-san, we might not end as a couple. Or worse, perhaps we would never meet each other."
I frowned, "So you'd prefer that I was gang-raped?"
Kyou looked sad hearing it, "I-I'm sorry, Maou-san!" he apologized, "Not that I wanted that incident to happen, but I always think that everything has its cause and effect."
"How so?"
Kyou took a long pause before he answered. "Have you ever seen "The Butterfly Effect" acted by Ashton Kutcher, Maou-san?"
I shook my head. I rarely watched movies, so my knowledge in this area was very shallow.
"It was about this boy who could go back to the past and tried to fix everything to make his life perfect," he explained, "But each time he fixed something, he messed up other things instead, and it kept getting worse and worse each time he changed the past. Until he messed up pretty bad for the last time and made him couldn't go to the past and fix anything anymore. When he finally found a way to go back, he reset everything where he never befriended with his most beloved person from the first time, so he wouldn't ruin that person's life..."
I listened to his story quietly, starting to get where this story was heading.
"I was taken aback with the moral of the story. Even a small change in someone's past could cause a major different in his current life. So, I'm saying, if your past changed, you might not met me at all, we might live our own separate lives without knowing each other, and I don't want that to happen..."
He smiled wryly, attaching his forehead with mine and kissed the tip of my nose while at it.
He smiled wryly, attaching his forehead with mine and kissed the tip of my nose while at it.
"I love you so much that I don't want to lose you," he hugged me tightly when he said that.
He gazed at me lovingly and kissed me. I closed my eyes and kissed him back. My heart was fluttering and I felt very happy by his words.
"I never regret everything I've experienced in my whole life. Because I believe that everything I have in the past was making me the way I am today. And I love being who I am. I know I never had a terrible experience in my past like you, Maou-san. And the past can never be changed. All you have to do is leave the bad things behind, take it as a lesson, and move forward. So, you too, should start to love yourself. If you do, then you'll have no regrets in your life."
He was right. All this time I always hate myself. I wished everything would changed so my life would've been easier. But instead of regretting what I didn't and could never have, I should have tried to cherish everything that I have today. Having him by my side as an example...
"I love you for the way you are, Maou-san. I love everything about you. I hope you start to love yourself too. Don't belittle your self value. You're much worth than you think you are..."
A stab of pain struck my chest. My throat choked and my eyes started brimming with tears. I was so happy that I'd cry. I never thought that I was so lucky to be beloved by this man so much.
Kyou panicked seeing me crying, "I-I'm very sorry Maou-san! Did I say something wrong? Please don't cry. I'm the one at fault; I won't say anything like that, ever again."
I shook my head and smiled, though tears were streaming down my cheek. I kissed him and said, "I love you too, Kyou..."
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| "I love you too, Kyou..." I said. |
=====End=====
